Photo spam

Been taking lots of pictures using instagram...

Wow.. Just Wow.

I'm currently stalking a Korean Group called 2PM,  (teehee) I discovered their twitter accounts and I saw this:

It's from Nichkhun! It's really nice to see something like this at the end of the day. No wonder he has a lot of fans and followers.

I decided to follow his tweets since most of his tweets are in English :p

Merry Christmas~! (260th post)

Merry Christmas to all ^_^

I finally finished my SAI drawing today... I really hate the hair.. I don't understand why I can't draw a good hairstyle on her... but I got the technique of drawing the hair.. At least...

Still not perfect.. but I think I'm improving... I still suck at mixing colors...

Fruit slices!

These buggers made my hands hurt!!! I bought some fimo fruit canes at a Nail Art Kiosk at Market Market. They're so difficult to slice.. =_=



Sorry for the low res photo... Too tired to look for my cam...

A few more things to do for xmas, I hope I finish on time...

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Random Thoughts

I would've been hyper today I wasn't nursing a 6 day migraine... Anyway my brain's super active on my way to work...

Artsy Fartsy:
I started my day by putting some acrylic primer on my minis. Using polymer clay is easier than working with air dry clay... I really suck at painting and mixing colors. I just hate baking my polymer clay and it's expensive! I'll try to prime my butterfly wings before painting them. I tried using India ink on air dry clay and the ink seeped through the wings. I hope the primer I bought would help.

Speaking of prices, build city at Shang has polymer clay.

Age:
It so funny that I was mistaken (TWICE) for a "teenager" or "student" last week. GWAHAHAHA~! First, was the cab driver when I was on my way to go jogging with a friend. Second, was the ophthalmologist I went to last Saturday. Both were lecturing me about doing stuff teenagers shouldn't do.. like ride a cab alone at night, or being experimental with colored contacts from Korea. Hahaha! They were both surprised when I told them my age. The doctor was really nice, I didn't really have a consultation but he gave me tips about my contacts since he thought I was a teenager who didn't know what she was doing. Hahahaha

Work in Progress: SAI Drawing

My friend noticed that most of my posts have been about make up and some other shallow stuff. So I decided to post something artsy fartsy.

Most of my SAI drawings are left undone.. Mostly because I get frustrated when I see other peoples art works... but my latest work seems to be better than my other drawings... 

Inspired by my colored contacts HAHAHAH

Product Rant: Ever Bilena Make up Remover

I bought this make up remover since I was running out of my Maybelline Eye and Lip Make-up remover.. Unfortunately, it stings my eyes so much and it doesn't really remove my Majolica Majorca mascara =_= I guess I'm not "hiyang" with Ever Bilena products. I tried their lip stain on the back of my hand and I got rashes.

Shopping like crazy: Majolica and Shiseido Haul

For the past few weeks I've been shopping/spending like crazy.. I guess I just have too much free time (and freedom)... I feel like I deprived myself for 3 years and I've been releasing all the things I let go... opportunity costs...

I went to an outlet sale today! The one posted by many bloggers, apparently they didn't really advertise for certain reasons that I have no liberty of saying on my blog. I spent a little below 2500 php for 11 items from Shiseido and Majolica Majorca/ Oh wait, they're the same company, HAHAHA... *cough cough* Lemming *cough cough*

The lipglosses aren't mine, I'll probably give them to my darling nieces.

Getting By and Getting There

Last night, I had an epiphany, so to speak. While talking to a good friend (Hi Kem, I know you're embarrassed  about reading my oh-so-girly-blog), I realized that my image of myself changed.

I like how I look. I know it sounds conceited, but it's a drastic improvement from when I was still in a relationship. I loved him more than I loved myself, to the point of compromising on my own birthday just for him to do what he wanted.

I don't know what exactly changed me, fruits of my labor maybe? Though, I can't say I'm 100% recovered from the break up but I'm getting there. I do (and I won't deny) find myself somewhat nostalgic at times and I know it's wrong to repress my emotions, but that's how I cope. I'm only protecting myself, hoping that I'd be desensitized soon.

However, don't get me wrong, I'm definitely happy. I have good friends and I very well know who they are.

Preparing for Christmas

For the past few weeks I've been doing a lot of preparations for what to give my friends this Christmas. I have only done experiments using ADC but I decided to use ADC instead of polymer clay for this year. I'm just too lazy to bake.

Can you guess what these are? I won't tell~

I took a super low res photo on purpose... Wahahaha!

I've successfully mass produced some bases for my "gifts" I had fun taking them out of my DIY molds.

Compared to polymer clay, I had a majorly difficult time mixing paints to get the colors I needed. Mixing colors  seems to be my weakness =_=

I think the next problem I'd be facing would be painting some details on the bases I've made =_=

DFA experience: Rude Guards and the Dress Code

Update - Sept, 2013: Updating a 2 year old post because some people can't be as constructive as the comments below. :) :) :) :) (Sorry na lang, my blog, my space... If you need anger management, I can help you get professional help.)

Gist of the post:
MAJOR ISSUE: Rude guards
Minor issue/Room for improvement: The DFA website should have posted a reminder for people like me. They have a website, it's a powerful tool to get information across.
What I got out of my misadventure: I was able to buy one of my favorite pairs of canvas shoes! I don't use it every day because I don't want to wear it out... yes, I love it that much.

Daiso Haul and Xmas Gifts

I bought some stuff from Daiso in preparation for my Christmas Gift Project!

I ended up buying  2 pink contaniers, a set of individual containers with lids, a bunch of batteries, a 6 pc file set, a mini fan with spray and an accessorry stand... I think I'll give the accessory stand away to my sister or one of my nieces.

I bought a whole bunch of organizers. =_=

I still have no idea what to do about my Christmas Presents.. maybe mini pastries? =_=

Re-ment in the Philippines

I recently discovered that Re-ment was available in the Philippines and was available in a mall near my home! I was so excited about it I ended up buying some stuff.

The only thing I disliked is that they only have limited items... I wanted a dining set but they only had a dining set with Lilo and Stitch prints splattered all over. I wish they had the simple items. All the items had a character splattered on it... I would've bought the Alice in wonderland items but I couldn't afford at that time so I chose the Mickey Showcase. It's simple enough for me. I would've bought the Rilakkuma Dining set but they didn't have it...

Photography: More Macro

Sorry for being boring, I just took a lot of experiments with my cam lately. Here's my third attempt using a reverse ring. This time I did it at night. My light source was a desk lamp with a 40 watt bulb and a mirror.

I used a syringe for this.

I'm not really satisfied with this yet... I wanna get closer shots.

I hope no one gets bored with my random posts.

Photography: Fill the Frame

I've been practicing my photography quite a lot lately.. I dunno why, but at least I'm doing something productive.

Since my night photography was an  utter mess. I'm sharing an attempt on a composition technique by filling the frame of the picture.

Photography: Reverse Ring Experiment (Part 2)

I think/feel like I'm getting better at macro photography, I desperately need a tripod though... However, I think I need to practice on other areas like landscapes, portraits... =_=... I also tried doing the water drop thing but I wasn't successful.

This isn't my first time using the reverse ring, I tried once during summer but I didn't get to explore too much. This is my second time experimenting with the ring. Unfortunately, the sun didn't really cooperate so I only have a few good shots.

Anyway, since I had a rough day,I'm sharing a few of my lucky shots to lighten my mood a bit.

A morning glory~!

I feel like a different person already!

This week was devoted to sports~! I did wall climbing this Monday and Ultimate frisbee Wednesday night!

Wall climbing, I used to love wall climbing when I was in college. However, when Orson died I was afraid to go wall climbing again. Even though his death was not related to climbing, I just couldn't... He used to be a good friend and the varsity team captain for our university...

For my first climb, I started to panic halfway to the top... everything in me started to shake. My friend was wondering what happened to the oh-so-fearless-Ekai who would go scuba diving (with sharks.. and I have a certificate to prove it!) or surfing even if she didn't know how to swim. I was determined to overcome it but I only got to 2/3 of the wall. I tried 3 times... my arms were already shaking and I didn't want to push myself too much. So I gave up.. (For this week). I'll dedicate my first successful climb to Orson.

I think that was the main reason for my MAJOR mood swing afterwards... I knew I can do it but I just couldn't. And the lack of sleep...

Artsy Fartsy: More molds

Nothing went as planned today... I'm absolutely frustrated because my internet's super slow, I wanted to watch another episode of Ao no Exorcist but my net was crawling. I decided to prepare for my X-mas gifts this year but I ended up doing a few Sukerukun molds.

Ok, Ok... I made more than a few. I was bored and getting really impatient so I had to distract myself. I made 6 trips to the microwave for these molds!!! Grrrr...

Thinspiration

Quoting my friend Madz for the title.

I decided to post some of my favorite pictures here on my blog to serve as something to work for.

Personality Development: Sports

Ever since I graduated, I started hating sports. I became sedentary and lazy to an extreme. I used to go Wall climbing and play tennis...

During high school and college, the varsity players were inviting me to join the club for tennis... but I think the only invited me because there aren't many tennis players here. A friend told me that if they were inviting me, I must be good at it.. I can't really say I was good though because I never competed.

Anyway, yesterday night I joined my friends' training for their favorite sport: Ultimate Frisbee. It was frustrating because the sport required more wrist action similar to badminton. However, I had fun... I pretended to be a ninja practicing shuriken throws. HAHA

Back hand shuriken throw~!

Forhand Shuriken Throooowww~!

I can't wait for the next time I play.

The Concert

My friends and I watched the BEP concert last night. Though I only have one song of theirs in my ipod, I know them and I don't really hate the music~

I was so excited about the concert I couldn't concentrate at work. I wanted to take some snapshots of the concert grounds but I couldn't get any good shots because I was only using my Satio.

It rained a few hours before the concert

 And then I got distracted...

Blue Dragonfly~

I saw a dragonfly today inside a salon, I thought it wasn't real and took a picture of it.. then it flew away~!

I wish I had my D60 with me to take a better shot...

I am a Dreamer: I just had to share this.

Day 86 - Head in the Clouds
Originally uploaded by margolove

I love the writings on the picture... this picture made my day.

I am a ball of contradictions, I am reflected light, I am a dreamer, I am an escapist, I am easily hurt, I am frightened...

Competition

I have nothing "positive" to blog about... My mind is blank and I haven't been able to try new things lately. Nothing really sparks my interest at the moment.

I've been battered with a lot of competitions and mind games from my ex... It's really taking it's toll. It seems like he has a delusional competition on who will be the first one to move on. I didn't want to compete. However, I have a message for him:

I'll accept your challenge only if you can make me admit defeat on the following:

1. Education
2. Family
3. Experience
4. Work/Money

I know you're young and you and your rebound prospects have the looks, I'll admit defeat in those areas even though I don't need to wear skimpy clothes or show skin to prove my self worth. But you know, looks can only go so far and with age, there is experience, wisdom and a future for myself with or without you. How about you finish school before you try to challenge me to a competition on life and how to live life.

Blog Title: Reflections of a Manic Dreamer

Time to say goodbye to my blog title, Sushi and Sashimi were the terms of endearment my ex and I had before we became an item. Seeing my blog title was like a stab-to-my-heart reminder that things have already ended.

SO!!! I decided to adapt my old multiply blog title "Reflections of a Manic Dreamer" Since my blog doesn't really have a niche like beauty bloggers or tech bloggers, the title still fits me.

Slightly dark, and idealistic.

It was fun reading my old posts... although my last few posts were mostly rants and emo stuff... I was a different person then...

Cruise Buffet...

Super late post...

I was supposed to post this on Sept 14, however after recent events in my life I wasn't able to post any interesting entries other than my random emo posts.

My officemates and I were supposed to go on a Cruise Buffet last Sept 14, but the waves were too strong because of the wind and the coast guard didn't allow us to "set sail" so to speak. We could've stayed to eat but most of us got dizzy (especially me) and we wouldn't get the most of our money if we did. Instead, I practiced taking nice photos.

Unfortunately, this is a little too late because the typhoon Pedring came to our country and it could be a while before I get another chance to take a cruise buffet around Manila Bay (and I might be a little too scared to do it).

Acceptance

I knew it... my happiness yesterday, wasn't permanent. Though I got what I needed, the reality I was talking about yesterday, did slap me in the face early this morning.

My heart is breaking. It's so painful I can't breath.

My denial shielded my heart from pain last week. However, this time I have to accept my decision yesterday. The acceptance is what's painful. This morning I woke up with the feeling of regret, wishing that I accepted to go back to him. He asked me back but he said everything would be different, he would be mean to me on purpose. If he didn't want to meet for a month, we wouldn't meet for a month. If he didn't feel like calling me, he wouldn't call. If he tells me to call, I have to call.

Why on earth would I regret turning him down? I still love him.

He knew I would say yes despite all that... but instead I said "Don't tempt me" I could have said "Ok" and acted differently and acted like an assertive girlfriend and demand for quality time when I wanted to like how mean he could be to me... but would I be happy like that?

Nostalgia and Regret are the two main things I'm feeling right now. Is it because I finally let go?

I can't pretend to be strong today... I can't breath... Strength.. please come back. Everything reminds me of him even the little things I see everyday... buses, phones, my ipod, anime, online games, facebook... even the things that aren't really related to him reminds me of him... even men...

Argh!!! I need back up!

Tomorrow

I'm happy today. I wish I will be happy when I wake up tomorrow when reality hits me in the face.

Today, I ambushed my ex at his neighborhood to demand a proper break up. Hehehe he was ignoring me and it was breaking my heart even more than when he said that we should break up. I put on my battle gear (Water Proof eye make up) and asked 2 of his friends to come with me.

Four (4) of his close friends accompanied me to ambush him. I was surprised they supported me no matter what decision I made. I felt loved and appreciated. I'm very thankful for having their support. Actually, all of them supported me somehow. This made me happy as well...

Ambushing him was part of my plan to love my self more. This was for closure, my inner peace. It was worth it. I wanted him back but I need to value and love myself more this time so I decided not to be tempted despite still being very much in love with him.

I was ready for an awful fight, I knew he was annoyed and stressed but I asserted that I didn't deserve to be ignored and get snapped at after all the things we've been through. Although I'm not sure how sincere he was, I think he acknowledged what I was saying when I saw his face change. We didn't end up fighting.

I was honest in saying that I loved him, but I treasured our friendship more than anything at the moment. I assured him that I wanted him in my life but only as a friend. He accepted my friendship and I finally told him that we should finally say our goodbyes.

Even though our relationship ended, it ended with a hug and a smile.

I'm not sure if he was only being polite but this was enough for me. I can't look at another man the way I did with him but give me time... eventually, I can recover... I will recover.

Letting go and the healing process

I need to replace my blog title,  it used to be meaningful to me but now I'm in the process of healing from a broken heart. I am  hurt without a doubt. I cry every night but it's all normal. And I'm confident that my new and old friends will be here for me.

I don't think I'll regret my almost 3 years with him, I was happy. I loved him but I have to let him go.

"A breakup is like a broken mirror, it is better to leave it broken than to hurt yourself to fix it"

I'll be fine, eventually. Like my friend said to me "For the meantime, you'll whine a bit and plot a lot more, Hahahaha" He knows me so well!

If you ask me personally, I won't deny that I'm hurt and a little fragile. but I'm trying hard to look at my situation in a different way and see it as an opportunity.

Letting go

This is the most difficult thing to do, at the moment. I hope I can survive this ordeal... I know my friends would be there to support me no matter what but I am too ashamed to admit any thing or to ask for help.

I am devastated but all I can do now is to accept whatever comes. It will be a really hard journey from now on. I know I'm not alone, I know I can have all the support I need. I just can't ask...

I need to accept this. There's nothing I can do. I am sad. I'm not who I used to be before, someone who can turn off all her emotions in one second. I don't think I can be like that this time around...

I need time... I need good friends... I don't need unnecessary attention from people I don't trust.

To my friends, don't ask me what's making me sad personally. I will cry even if I'm in a public place... I'll try to look normal out side... just don't ask me yet. Don't hug me yet, I might break down and cry. This is something I know I can't deal with please be patient with me.

I'll be putting on a mask for a while... This is something I need to do until I recover... but don't be fooled...

This was one of my favorite poems when I was a troubled younger version of myself...

Random Post about photography

I went to the Manila Cathedral in Intramuros, Manila today to attend a wedding. Intramuros is a beautiful place. I wish I could go there just to take photos... when I'm confident about my photography skills.  Although recently, I've been able to get some pretty shots and I recently won a photo contest at work, I got 2nd place. I was a little bit disappointed to discover something about the contest. The guy who won first place on all categories for the contest was the one who organized the contest and he was also the one who wrote the mechanics of the contest. I didn't hear it first hand though...

I got another lucky shot today this afternoon. ^__^ I also decided to add a watermark to it.

click to enlarge~ 

I guess my friend K is helping me a lot by giving me tips about photography.

Yogi Blue Berry Slim Tea~!

I was finally able to buy tea~! I bought something to curb my cravings~!

I LOVE the packaging! I also played around with my camera... I experimented on the different exposure levels of my camera ^_^ (I only used my Satio here)

I really look forward to drinking this tea in the morning! It smells great but it's a little too bitter for me.

Lemming for Tea ^_^

My officemates and I, went to Healthy Options last week to check if they had the feverfew supplements I wanted for my migraines. They did have the feverfew supplements but it was way out of my budget >_< I still need to do more research about it...

While we were in the store, I was distracted by the teas they had... I wanted all!!! There were 2 brands that caught my eye, Yogi Tea and The Republic of Tea. Yogi is a lot cheaper than The Republic of Tea. Yogi is selling 16 tea bags for 249 Php (around $5) and The Republic of Tea had 6 tea bags for 275 Php (around $6).

I love the packaging of The Republic of Tea, they had labels like "Get Gorgeous" for clear skin or "Get a Grip" of PMS!

I went through the websites of both brands... I LOVE Yogi Tea's layout! (Is there a blogger rule about posting screen caps? Oh well, I'll just remove it if they ask me to).

3 Choices~ Mood, Flavor or Purpose

Trying out Oyumaru molds

I thought I uploaded some pics of another experiment I tried this month. I couldn't find the pictures I took for my Oyumaru experiment...

Last May, I was able to buy Oyumaru from Saizen for half the price of the online stores here in the Philippines... goodness... some people LOVE to over price their stuff.

I was successful in making molds for my butterfly wings. but my cupcake mold was a disaster.. but I'm happy about it.

Air Dry Clay Strawberry experiment

As soon as I bought my cheap Air Dry Clay I already had a list of things I really wanted to do, and miniature strawberries are one of the, which was of course inspired by Snowfern Clover's video tutorial

I wasn't able to make perfect minature strawberries... most of the ones I made look like mutant strawberries or mangled fruits...

notice the little box? ^_^

I painted the strawberries with acrylic paint and glossed it with acrylics as well.

Well, I couldn't say this experiment was a complete failure, right? I also made a little box for my little strawberries~!

Somewhere in Time

Today, for the first time in my life, I couldn't stand listening to my mother's favorite song. I remember her listening to the song "Somewhere in Time" a lot before she died. I always wanted to learn to play that song on the piano and I think it was the only reason I kept on playing the piano when I was younger but I never had the courage to open my sheet music and learn it.

When I was still young I couldn't accept her death and kept comparing her to the evil step mother who tried hard to copy my mother's looks (even her hair cut) and actions. I cry when I hear the song.

Today, I got an email from a YouTube subscription I had for a while, from someone who used to be dear to me. We had a fall out because of a petty misunderstanding about a guy she was dating, a guy she thought she loved. I would rather not narrate our conversation here out of respect, my last favor to her. She was playing my mother's song.

I admit I do have a grudge. I honestly speechless, I am unable to describe what I feel for someone who can drop  a friendship for a rebound guy.

It's been 2 years now, I've reached out, now I think it's time to let go.

My Miniature obsession

I just wanted to share the reason behind my fascination for miniatures, I've only, until recently, picked up my miniature hobby. It started out with my polymer clay jewelry hobby then it eventually evolved into miniatures.

I went on a clay hiatus a few months ago, this was due to my frustration about dollhouses and miniatures. I as much as I want to try and create my own miniatures, I don't have the tools and materials to make any, other than my polymer clay. I don't remember if I ever mentioned here about my art mantra.

As long as I have the right tools, I can do anything.

When I was younger, maybe 7 or 8, I remember looking at a Victorian doll house catalog. I would sit in my room all day hoping and wishing I could buy every single table and chair and bed and pillow I saw in that catalog.

I think wasn't as interested in the bedroom displays though, I totally LOVED the living room and dining room settings.

*sigh* I wish I kept that catalog.. but I'm a hoarder so I think I did... somewhere.

Artsy Fartsy: Paper clay experiment (IMG Heavy)

I found some tutorials on how to make my own DIY whipped cream out of PVC glue, air dry clay and some water ^_^ Since I bought really cheap air dry clay I tried it as soon as I found some icing tips at the grocery or the mall near my office.

Here are the results of my messy but fun experiment...

I used a plastic tip (I don't know the number of the tip but it was a little to big for my miniatures).

Artsy Fartsy: Cheap Paper clay~

I admit that I'm getting lazy doing my polymer clay miniatures. I'm too lazy to bake them! Which is why I'm considering an alternative to my miniature hobby~ Air Dry Clay! I wanted to practice first and check how I should work with ADC, so I went to our local bookstore and bought the 85 PHP ($2 approx.) ADC.

I got the idea to buy paper clay when I read about the types of ADC and paper clay was one kind of ADC!

Smart Puppy~

Roots and a new sketchbook

I was never really artistic when I was young. It was only until I watched the Tagalog version of Sailormoon that I started having an interest in drawing (and anime). Sailormoon makes me really nostalgic~ =_=

Art Attack! Handmade Felt Wallet~!

Of all the artsy fartsy things that I think I can do, sewing is one of my frustrations, aside from mixing colors. Anyway~ despite the Frankenstein looking wallet, I am SUPER happy about how it turned out.

As much as I want to give a tutorial, I would just feel stupid writing it... BECAUSE =_= I just cut everything in half and folded everything and stuff hahahaha =_= I think I just lowered my IQ...

Personal: Random Rants

My home will probably the only place where you'll see blood related people prioritizing the food of the maids, driver and a freeloader who's after my father's money. I don't eat breakfast, I'm at work at lunch and when I get home they tell me they cooked food that they knew I don't eat. I'm usually out whole day of Saturday and I'm home whole day of Sunday...



After a whole month of not eating, they only realized now that I haven't been eating at home.

Out of 21 meals per week, I can only eat 7 meals at home

and they can't even try to cook the meals I like to eat or meals that I can eat at least.

How can I not be pissed off..

Majolica Majorca Majoromantica~!

I was FINALLY able to buy Majolica Majorca's Majoromantica.. wahahahaha


Majolica Majorca's Majoromantica
Majolica Majorca's Majoromantica
Majolica Majorca's Majoromantica
Majolica Majorca's Majoromantica


=_= what a mouthful..


I've read a lot of reviews about this and I think most of the posts I've read were pretty accurate. I really like the smell but I have to control how much I put on because the scent can be overwhelming.


I think this is a new version of the product, since from what I remember the first bottle was a solid red bottle and this is a gradient pink bottle~

Lucky~

I seem to be lucky this month I've been getting some special treatment from July ^_^ A lot of things... even the little things have been making me feel happier, encouraged, accepted and hopeful. ^_^

Just wanted to share something that made my day this friday:

I ordered a tall coffee jelly drink from Starbucks before going home. I asked the barista if there was a drink that was "slightly" caffeinated, and he said we could make up a "half decaf" drink just for me. HAHAHA! I noticed the barista who was making the drinks prepared the drinks of a regular customer, who came after me, before my order.. When he finally gave me my drink I was surprised~

Look at my "half-decaf" tall coffee jelly with no whipped cream OVER FLOWING with happiness~!

The barista told me that he didn't want to waste the coffee so he tried to fill the cup as much as he can :) Things like this make me happy~!

>_< and this wasn't the first time this happened to me! First it was "bubbatealiscious" now it's Starbucks! It's definitely a great month.

The guys from bubbatealiscious are super kind enough to let me drink from my milk tea before they put the lid on my cup so that they can put the left over milk tea from their shakers~!

YAY TO NO LEFT OVERS!!

Miniature Spoons~!

I'm really happy I was able to buy a few mini spoons for my hobby~ I wish I have forks as well..

A little project

What could these be? ^_^




- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Inspiration

I stumbled onto a new miniature blog which I fell in love with after browsing a few pages.. ^__^

The blog is in Japanese and google translate isn't as accurate as I want it to be :( I think the name of the blog, according to the watermarks on the pictures,  is "Nunu's House"

(Photo credit: All pictures com from http://koapin.blog61.fc2.com/)

Join Kawaii Barbie's 100-200 + Followers Giveaway

Another Giveaway~!
Join Kawaii Barbie's 100-200 + Followers Giveaway~!!

I wish i'd get the eco tools brush.. ^_^

Nicole's Mirror First Birthday GIVEAWAY~ (wish me luck)

I'm joining ...

Nicole's Mirror First Birthday GIVEAWAY!!!

I hope I win the Urban Decay Primer or anything Shu >_< gosh! I want everything~!

I think this is my first time joining a giveaway.. ^__^

The Glee Project

I'm currently hooked on a show called "The Glee Project" which is a competition to get a guest appearance on the show Glee.

But.. The reason I'm hooked on the show is because I totally LOVE Cameron~! He reminds me of why I fell in love with my BF. Dorky, Cute, and Naive. Makes you want to mess him up and leave him disoriented HAHAHAHAHA just kidding.

I loved Episode 5 of the show! The episode about pairability where the contestants were paired up and performed duets... Cameron got paired up with Lindsay and she surprised him with a kiss!

Photo Credit

Eden Eternal: Bad experience

I'm my gaming life, I have never been accused of doing anything suspicious and getting banned because of it.. UNTIL NOW... I am absolutely frustrated that my AERIA GAMES account was suspended 2 times now. The people I play with in the Internet Cafe I go to we're also banned.

I'm really pissed... I feel like AERIA GAMES have singled out my friends and myself...

Just when I recommended the game to my officemates, they ban me...

I love the game... I hate the management...

Good Game + Bad Management = A game that's not worth playing.

Random Banning

I was currently playing a cute game called Eden Eternal from Aeria Games. HOWEVER, I "think" my account was banned... AGAIN.. for no reason at all... I tried to log in 3 or 4 times and the game didn't recognize my username and password and when I tried to login to the Aeria Games website I got the following error messages:

"Sorry. The account has been blocked due to violation of our terms of
service."

"Sorry. Unrecognized username or password."

I was banned 2 times including this time... 

The annoying thing is... Me and some other friend who are playing the game with not bots, no RTM or anything and WE were the ones who get banned while ALL those bots SHOUTING in all channels are SAFE.

I'm totally disappointed by it and ABSOLUTELY turned off by how they handle things like this...

Lemming for Aerosoles

I regret the day when I didn't pay attention to my Aerosoles in New York... I should've bought a pair because it was cheaper there than here in the Philippines..

I'm totally drooling over how comfy Aerosoles are ^_^ When my officemate and I tried the shoes in the Aerosoles store in MOA, we fell in love! Although I have to say that I don't really like the designs but the comfort compensates for it.

The first pair I bought was this design in black:

source:  Aerosoles.com

I wanted a more corporate design but I was having a difficult time choosing so I chose a design that I would use more often than a corporate looking shoe~

Here were my choices =_=

Southrole

Sprig Valley

I still want sprig valley... and one more heeled shoe... erm... ehehehe... I might as well buy both!!! But the South Role one didn't really look nice on my feet and the Sprig Valley was a little tight on my toes...

I kinda like the Plushed Velvet Design: 

Plushed Velvet

AND~

Yettuce Wrap

The ONLY 2 things I don't like about this brand are"

1. It's not for sweaty feet

2. Not for the rainy season~

Naughty blogger XD

I as much as I want to blog about my random stuff =_= my office internet connection is limited to just google and some not so popular websites... grrr...

So.. what have I been up to for the past few weeks?.. =_= Other than trying to adjust...trying out the things I hoarded in the mall beside my office~! My office actually has a bridge connecting to the mall~!

Anyway I went to Watson's after lunch and picked up some facial masks since I haven't tried any lately... I wanted to buy the Purederm Aloe Collagen Mask but I picked the Age Defying Collagen mask accidentaly...

It was kinda itchy like all the other sheet masks I've tried. So far the only sheet mask I loved was the Aloe Collagen mask...

This wasn't the first time I bought this rub on Whitening Mask from Montagne Jeunesse, I love products from this brand especially this mask in particular. Ever since I tried the aspirin mask, I have been obsessed about the smoothing effect of the DIY mask....

The whitening mask usually gives my baby smooth skin when I leave it overnight on my face, I haven't done it religiously as instructed so I can't say anything about the whitening effects.

I bought this Rub Me Tender Fog Peeling spray from Etude house quite a long time ago but I decided to mention it since I was talking about the aspirin mask effects...

This product also gives me baby butt smooth skin! I'm surprised that hardly anyone made a review about it. I love this product! It also smells like my cucumber melon perfume from bath and body works~!

I wish there are FREE miracle cures for skin problems... *sigh*

PERSONAL: I need to get this out...

For months, I have been crying my eyes out every weekend. Most people look forward to weekends, but not me. Every week the same promise is broken and I cry every time. My friends and officemates know me as a strong person but this time I can't be strong... I want to be strong... but it's so difficult to stop my tears. I wish I can give you my situation in detail... but I would rather say what I feel... I know I may say things that I might not mean but I really need to let this out...

I'm so tired of crying...
I want to give up on everything...
I feel like I'm being punished for having even a second of happiness...
I feel like I'm going crazy...
I want to disappear... I want to die but I don't want to kill myself...
I'm too scared of the pain...
I feel like I'm all alone...
I feel frustrated...
I want to hurt myself...
I don't want to feel anymore pain...
I want to escape...

I want to be happy again...
I don't want to cry anymore...
I want to overcome this disgusting self pity I'm feeling for myself... I have to...
I feel empty...

I can promise that I won't do anything stupid... even if I wanted to hurt myself, I'm too scared to do it. I just needed to let it out...

I really hate myself for not being able to tell my friends the truth about my problems... I'm too shy... I don't want to burden any one about it... I know my friends wouldn't mind... but I just can't even if i really wanted to... In denial? Pride? Embarrassment? Cowardice?

My problem is just some normal everyday thing.. I wish I can telepathically tell people to support me even if I don't open up...

After writing all this... I feel ashamed that I thought about those things... I feel much better though.. I just really needed to let it out... I wont do anything stupid...

Blog Luxury Award~ first time ever~

I haven't been blogging much since I started at my new office XD I still have no access to the internet.. I probably need to schedule some posts soon XD


Anyway, for the first time in my blogger life I got an award~ hihi Thanks Debbie~! Even though I don't have enough followers for this,  for the sake of getting to know each other (and aside from the fact I was super excited about this) I decided to post it anyway~

RULES: 
1. Link back to the person who passed you the award.
2. Share 7 random things about yourself.
3. Award 15 blogs.
4. Drop them a note and tell them about it.

SEVEN (7) RANDOM FACTS ABOUT ME

1. I was never creative or artistic when I was young. I only started drawing when I was on my 6th grade. Believe it or not, the anime Sailormoon changed my life XD HAHAHAHA!

2. I used to play the piano and the guitar since elementary to high school. I stopped playing when I was in college.

3. I never considered myself a workaholic but some people think I am...

4. Books are my crack~ I'm addicted to books like people are addicted to cigarettes or even drugs. I don't mind losing sleep or skipping meals when I have a book in hand.

5. I don't know how to swim. I'm scared of deep water BUT if you ask me to go surfing or diving, I wouldn't think twice to join you HAHAHAHA

6. I'm allergic to cigarette smoke and chocolates.

7. I can be a total dork when I'm comfortable with the people around me.

Now for the tagging~ Here are the blogs I like reading~

1. Nikki
2. Abygail
3. Pammy
4. miss Gee
5. Louise C.
6. Kristine R.
7. Sara Mari
8. dropdeadkawaii
9. Lauren
10. Colette
11. Eki
12. 17february
13. mischievousmack
14. Justine
15. Jen

Thanks~! <3

Bad BB Cream!

Look what happened to my bb cream!!!!!!



Evil evil packaging!!!!!

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